Do men like this exist?

Love this track – the lyrics are fabulous! Oh what a tune!

“…A thousand armies couldn’t stop me, no”, “Stormy weather couldn’t stop me, no” – ah! ..

(My respect to all those men out there who are not afraid of the meaning of this song)

‘Love is the only thing that interests me’

‘El amor en los tiempos del colera’, a great novel by Garcia-Marquez, I would say his best one (maybe I am biased though as love stories are my greatest weakness …)

There is a great scene (one of the most memorable for me, although indeed there are so many equally powerful ones) when lovesick Florentino Ariza, goes to work with his uncle, he is told off for his inability to write even a simple commercial letter without romantic poetry creeping in. “It’s no use,” protests Florentino, “Love is the only thing that interests me.”

I often am asked why I am attached to affairs of the heart which are so central to my writing. My reply is the same.

Scaffolding

Saw something interesting earlier – a very grande, well built, well to do house with scaffolding all over the front of the building itself. How could it be that such a strong looking building, made of concrete and bricks complete with all the inner wall block linings and other trimmings (you can tell I am not a builder can’t you?!?!); a symbol of resilience, of a fortress against the world, against the outside, how could such a protector, shelter from the cold, source of security, need the help of a few tubes of steel?

We all need scaffolding from time to time, I guess.

The importance of our own foundation

Change is imminent. Everything changes, nothing will ever stay the same. This is a fact that no-one can, ever has, nor indeed can they ever refute.

Life changes with the passing of the years; our thoughts will change the more we encounter the world; our minds through the increased interaction with others around us; our bodies change as nature must do what it has been ordained and age catches up with us; and so too does love.

Love, is something that is constantly evolving and as it does, it sometimes takes us by surprise especially if and when we are not adapted to it’s ever changing nature. As women this is something of which we must be aware. I say that as in the past this has meant nothing to me, but the other day I saw something that made me stop in my tracks and really think about me as a woman and my relation to love in the face of change. 

I was walking past the town centre and saw that a prominent part of the old structure is now rubble. Where once stood a great building, now nothing remained. I remember being a child, holding my parent’s hands, walking to town every Saturday morning. It was an excursion for us; for me an expedition, seeing these huge buildings towering above me. And yet, there I was passing nothing but emptiness.

Yes, they would build something new to replace the old building. Change is imminent. Sure it is. Of course it is. As these thoughts raced through my mind, I stopped. Suddenly. There in my tracks. I looked back at that space of now nothingness and looked to the building next to it. It was still standing, still that popular shop with customers walking in and out with their tills buzzing as they gladly took money for the sale of their goods (especially in light of the lamentable economic climate). This shop seemed unaffected by the disappearance of the building next to it. It was carrying on.

I reflected. Like that building, how many women, how many of us can say that when a loved one, when a man leaves our life, how many of us have that foundation of our own to carry on going and not crumble to the ground? Not many perhaps. I certainly never used to have it. That is why I went through a nervous breakdown when a man once walked out of my life to be with another woman.

You know how they say, ‘be strong, live for yourself first’ I am beginning to understand why they say it. And with the passing of each day, I am beginning to figure out how to do it. The starting point has to be a solid foundation. ■